Complied by Michelle and Justin Smith, 2016
Contributor: Hans Pew
Relationship to Nancy:
Cousin of Keith
I first met Nancy when we were both
part of a group going to some sort of Young Adult activity - I forget the
details. I believe she had just turned 18, and this was her first YA activity.
We were trying to fit about 10 people into a car that could probably hold four
comfortably. That's how I ended up with Nancy sitting on my lap moments after I
first met her.
I believe that Keith was also in the
car that night. In fact, it's possible that it was also the first time they
met, but I'm not sure about that. I'm sure they hadn't met much before that,
though, because it didn't take long at all for them to become an item. I
suspect that by the next week if we'd done the same thing Nancy would have been
on Keith's lap instead of mine.
Contributor: Summer Lydon
Relationship to Nancy:
Niece
When I was about 7 or 8 my family went to Idaho to visit
Aunt Nancy and Uncle Keith. It was summer time so it was warm enough to
sleep on the tramp. It was probably 2 or 3 am
before Kirsten, Alyse, Miranda, and I actually started settling into our
sleeping bags for the night. At the crack of dawn Nancy came out and started
jumping on the tramp screaming 'wake up sunshine's! It's time for morning
exercises.' We were all so tired it was not funny! The way she looked, tho,
jumping on the tramp was SUPER funny, and something I will never forget. I
remember thinking 'She is crazy! but the coolest aunt ever!!'
Contributor: Alison Yardley
Relationship to Nancy:
Niece
My very favorite memory of Aunt Nancy
is from when I was really little. I think I was 5 or 6 and she came over to my
parent's house to visit. I told her all about how one of my other aunts had a
special nail polish that made your nails dry more quickly after painting them.
Aunt Nancy said that she wasn't nearly that fancy and asked if I wanted to see
how she dried her nail polish. I of course said yes, and she then started
spinning in circles and waving her hands around in an attempt to "dry her
nail polish." When she finished she said, "they might not dry as
fast, but it's a lot more fun!"
I adored Aunt Nancy. She taught me all
about the importance of the little things and having fun! My time with her was
short, but I will never forget her. Love you Aunt Nancy. Happy 50th!
Contributor: Julie Borg
Relationship to Nancy: Dear
Friend
Nancy was one of my dearest friends. I
can honestly say I have felt her loss and thought about her every day since the
day she died. I loved her very much. She has impacted my life in a very
positive way and I am a different person because I knew her.
I knew her for about 5 years. I met her
when we she was pregnant with Andre and I was pregnant with my son Davis. We
were in the same ward and lived in the same neighborhood. We instantly bonded
and became good friends. I walked with her in the evenings quite often and we
would discuss everything from kids to books to art to rude people. I loved
those walks.
I have a lot of 'Nancyisms' in my life.
The one that helped me the most to cope with her death was something she said
when her dad died. She said "grief is like carrying bricks around in a
backpack. You never get rid of them, you always carry that backpack. But you
get stronger and it gets easier to carry."
Some other Nancyisms:
"Life is too short for paintings without people in them."
"Life is too short for paintings without people in them."
"Never trust people who are
judgemental."
"I'm sorry about the apple core
under the couch, but hey, that's just who we are."
"I want to paint a mural of angels
in the kids playroom, and the angel's faces would be my children." - Did
she ever paint that mural? I can't remember.
"The title 'The Angony and the
Ecstacy' describes the way I feel most of the time."
"Sometimes it hurts to hear people
complain that they miss their parents when they are on missions or whatever.
Their parents get to come home. They should celebrate every day that they are
alive, whether they or here or far away."
One thing I wanted to share that I
remember well is how much Nancy loved her baby Caleb. She was so in love with
him! She would stare at him a lot. One time she asked me to go 'rock shopping'
with her. She wanted to build a fountain in her yard. We were in the middle of
a rock yard where you could drive your car right in and you were surrounded by
the rocks. She wouldn't leave Caleb in the car while we looked, not even if I
was in the car with him! She insisted on carrying him in his carrier as she
looked at all the rocks. She never wanted to leave his side. I noticed this
several times in the short time she was with him. She was constantly looking at
him.
Everything I did with her was an
adventure. Furniture shopping, trips to the used bookstore, rock shopping,
going out to dinner together, hearing her read something she wrote ('The Blue
Velvet Couch' is my favorite). I remember when she wrote her own obituary. She
read it to me over the phone. She was in a hurry to read it because I think she
had a class to get to. I remember thinking how funny it was that she read it so
fast, the story of her death. It seemed kind of ironic at the time. Her love of
music, her love of writing and her love of reading and her love of life in
general. One time I cleaned her wedding ring for her, and while she sat there
watching me she talked about where the sand that was embedded in it came from,
which was from a trip her and Keith took somewhere, probably the beach. She
turned much of everyday life into an incredibly told story. Life was just
so rich when I was with her.
I love Nancy and I am so glad I knew
her. My life changed after she died. It has left a sad place in my heart and I
am so excited to see her again some day and talk about all the things we never
got to discuss. I think about her when big things happen. When 9/11 happened I
wondered about the fact that she was probably right there, helping those people
find their way to heaven. I think about her when there is a passing away
and calling of new prophets. I think about her with books I have read. I wonder
how she would have felt about Kindle. I wonder if she would have been a good
texter. Can you imagine the funny conversations she would have had over texting
and Facebook? Having her first grandchild, watching her children graduate. I
think about her all the time and imagine conversations we would have about
these things.
I could go on for pages about my
memories with her, but I will just say that I second what I'm sure everybody
else says about her. She was a magnificent person. I loved her so much. My life
changed the day I met her. I pray for her children often.
Thanks for letting me share some of my
sacred memories of a wonderful person and friend.
Contributor: Sara Smith
Relationship to Nancy:
Older Sister
When Nancy was in her senior year of High
School and I was in college we choreographed a dance to "The Pink
Panther". It was in our split level house and she would go up the stairs
and I would go down then we would fly back into the middle like it was a
mirror. It was a fun dance that nobody but us ever saw.
Some people may not know this but I
went out with Keith before Nancy. I enjoyed my time with him, but that's all it
was. Nancy started dating him and they were just on the verge of getting
serious when there was a letter in Dear Abby or Ann Lander column about someone
complaining about her friend dating her boyfriend named Keith. The heading of
the article was "Keep your hands off Keith". So Nancy put a
'threatening note' on my bedroom door with the article attached. I had seen the
article and I almost cut it out and put it on her bedroom door. We had a good
laugh over that one.
After Keith and Nancy were married she
babysat her niece Carol Weaver. When Carol needed her diaper changed Nancy
would use yellow rubber gloves to change it. After Alyse was born I think she
used the gloves a few times but realized it wasn't practical.
When we were in college we used to go
dancing. We would get together a group of 7 to 10 people and we would crash BYU
dances wherever we could get in. The group seemed to change, but it usually
contained cousins or siblings. We would do some couple's dances but mostly we
would go in the middle of the dance floor and dance as a group. We used to get
lots of interesting looks. I'm surprised we didn't get thrown out. Favorite
songs were "I wear my sunglasses at night", "Whip It", and
"Twist and Shout". Favorite dance was straight jumping up and down,
Richards famous "Cockroach", and the Swing.
Contributor: Erick and Liz
Pew
Relationship to Nancy:
Cousin to Keith
Liz:
My memories of Nancy really started
when she and Keith moved to Boise. I didn't really know her very well before
that. We didn't have any other family in Boise so it was really fun to
have them move here. One of my favorite memories of Nancy is her singing
in our group. She had a great voice and we often gave the alto solos to her
because she had the right attitude for the song and of course a lot of
personality.
I always enjoyed the fact that Nancy
was always so interested in everybody that she met including me. She would
remember something about you and ask about how that was going and then she
always wanted to engage you in a conversation about politics or just something
in general she'd been reading about and so it was always fun talking to her.
She enjoyed variety in life and I know she enjoyed reading and writing and
learning about new places and I know she was really jealous when Keith and
Erick got to go to Italy together for work and she didn't get to go. One of The
things on her bucket list was to make it to Florence, Italy and other places in
Italy to see the wonderful art and everything else of course. She loved
being a mom and she loved the gospel. One of my favorite experiences that Nancy
and I shared was that our daughters really wanted to see the new Star Wars #1
movie that was coming out ( not #4-6) and so we decided that we would go
put a tent up in the parking lot at Edwards theaters and camp out with our
daughters overnight to get tickets the day they started selling. There
were parties and people dressed up and stuff going on all night long and so I
don't think that we really slept much and we had a lot of fun. I took the first
half of the night and stayed till about two in the morning and then she came
and stayed the second half of the night with the girls and I went home and
slept the second half of the night. As we did the change of guard we of course
stayed and chatted a little bit together and played with the girls so it was a
fun night. I know that it will be a memory that our daughters will
hopefully remember and mostly just because she was as crazy as I was to camp
out when the men didn't want to do it.
Not long before Nancy passed away, Nancy
and I had a conversation over the phone (because she had already moved to
Texas) about whether or not we should make some changes in our family and sell
the house we were living in and perhaps find a house with a smaller yard to
take care of, maybe find a ward with youth Anna’s age in it and so Erick could
be closer to work. We had a long conversation and she gave me some advice and I
just remember her last words to me were something to the effect of: "I
just have a feeling that good things are coming and that changes are going to
be made and it will all be for the best and I know that you will listen to the
spirit and everything will work out". For some reason that meant so much
to me because she had taken the time out of her busy day to chat with me and
make sure I was doing OK and she left me feeling uplifted and encouraged to
pursue our course of action. That was the last time I talked to her. But Nancy
really didn't leave. She's always been there in spirit and her personality and
her love of life is evident in her children as well and someday we will be with
her again.
Erick:
The one story I would add to what Liz
said about Nancy is this one. One day I called Keith and Nancy’s house. I don’t
remember whether I was calling to talk to Keith or Nancy, but Nancy was the one
who answered the phone. As soon as she picked up the phone she said, “Talk to
me babe!” I was taken aback and took a second before telling her who was
calling and what for. I was never quite sure if she was expecting a call from
Keith for some reason, or if that’s how she answered the phone when some random
stranger was calling.
Contributor: Laurel Johnson
Miller
Relationship to Nancy:
Sister-in-law
One Easter our family went to Boise to visit Keith and
Nancy. After the kids were all sleep the grown-ups stayed up late talking.
Nancy told me she had good news to share. She said she was 3 months pregnant. I
was delighted and congratulated Keith and Nancy. We spent a good hour talking
about pregnancy and whether it would be a boy or girl etc. In the morning Alyse
came in to the family room where I had been sleeping. I said, “Alyse, are you
excited for the new baby?” She gave me a funny look, so I told her that her mom
told me she was pregnant last night. Alyse got a cheesy grin and said, “Was it
after midnight?” I said, “Yes, why?” Then suddenly realized that I had been
sucked in good. It was April 1st. Apparently Alyse, even at that
young age knew her mom well. When Nancy came in I told her I figured out her
trick. She really wasn’t pregnant. Nancy and I had a good laugh.
A few years later we were getting extended family
pictures taken. While we were trying to get everyone looking at the camera and
smiling people were saying, “Say cheese” etc. Nancy said, “Everybody say, I’m
pregnant!” We laughed and nobody gave it a second thought later we learned that
she really was announced she was pregnant.
Contributor: Holly Miller
Hunter
Relationship to Nancy:
Niece
During the holidays Keith and Nancy’s family came down to
visit Utah. She took Kirsten, Alyse, Janna and I to Provo Town Center Mall to
have a girls day. She took us to some of the fancy dress shops and pretended we
were looking for flower girl dresses so we could try on fancy dresses and look
like princesses. Looking back I am amazed that she would choose spending the
day with 8 years olds and 11 year olds running around the mall. She made me
feel so special and included. I love her and if I can be half the woman she is
then I would be lucky.
Contributor: Miranda
Johnson Carmichael
Relationship to Nancy:
Niece
One of Nancy’s LEAST favorite songs is “Back at One” by
Brian McKnight. We would make up different lyrics to make fun of the song.
Unfortunately, the only line I can remember is “5 make you fall out of a tree!”
SO funny! Love her and her fun personality! Every time this comes on, Nancy is
the ONLY thing that comes to my mind!
Contributor: Adrienne Miller Henderson
Relationship to Nancy: Niece
When Nancy came to visit us in NY, she was always coming
up with creative ways to entertain us kids. One night she pulled out a bag of
pretzel sticks. We spend the rest of the night designing pictures out of the
pretzels all over our kitchen counter.
Contributor: Lindy Johnson
Relationship to Nancy:
Niece-in-law
I unfortunately never had the privilege of knowing Nancy.
But I have been blessed to be a part of the family that has been created in her
absence. I have so many fond memories with all of her children. Each one of
them I truly feel as if they are my own siblings. I think if Nancy could be
here today she would be overwhelmed with pride to see the people her children
have grown up to be! I miss that I never knew her, I know she would have been
one of my favorite people!
Contributor: Mark Moody
Relationship to Nancy:
Son-in-law
[Memory about Andre] There was a discussion about doing a
play. I can’t remember who suggested “We should do a family play”. Andre
immediately shouted, “I GET TO PLAY CALEB!”
Contributor: Jill Osborn
Relationship to Nancy:
Niece
I met Nancy when I was 10 months old at her wedding. She
always made me laugh. I loved when she taught us how to play “Super Scum”. I
was always really intrigued by Nancy. She has had a great influence on me in
way I didn’t even realize until I was an adult. Her love for learning and example
of attending so many college classes is one of the things that had the most
influence on me and inspired me to seek a college education. Even though I was
a child and teen while I knew Nancy, she always treated me with the same
respect as she did other adults. I loved that she would talk to me about grown
up topics from shaving legs, to things she was writing about her ancestors or
short stories about running to the store to buy a last minute box of condoms.
Her ability to show such sincere interest in other people was amazing. I think
I miss all the intellectual topics and conversations I would have had with her
as an adult the most. How I wish I could sit and converse with her about so
many things. Even after 16 years I still think about Nancy and Keith and the
huge influence they have had on me.
Contributor: Michelle
Johnson Smith
Relationship to Nancy:
Niece and sibling to Nancy’s kids
Honestly, I don’t have very many
specific memories of Nancy. I definitely remember her smile and her laugh, and
that she made you love to be around her. I remember when she and Keith went to
look for homes in Texas right before she moved back and Andre stayed with us. I
remember that she was so sweet with him and that she loved him.
I think my most profound memory of
Nancy is really a reaction I had to an experience that Kevin had. I think it
was during the same trip that she was dropping off Andre to stay with us. Kevin
must have been 15 or so, but she sat down with him and talked for a while about
computer stuff with him. She took time to listen to him talk about
"nerdy" stuff that maybe she didn't know much about, but she engaged
in this conversation with Kevin and made him feel important, and made his
interests feel important as well. I remember Kevin telling my mom about the
conversation later and expressing how good it felt that she would take the time
to actually TALK with him and be interested in his computer hobby rather than
just be polite enough to listen to him tell her about it. And that it was cool
that she could have an intelligent conversation about it, even though she
wasn't a computer expert.
Over the years that always stuck with
me. Throughout Jr High and High School as I'd try to think about what I should
do when I "grow up" I was never sure. But I always kept coming back
to the idea that I wanted to be able to have an intelligent conversation with
anyone about anything. It ended up being one of the underlying reasons that I
didn't continue to pursue piano in college. I felt like I needed to diversify
my experience and my studies in order to really be able converse about a
variety of topics.
The other element to Kevin and Nancy's
conversation that makes Nancy is awesome is that she was able to make him feel
like she was interested in him. This is something that I am striving to be more
like. I admire her ability to connect with people in this way.
Contributor: Annette Cleveland
Relationship to Nancy:
Cousin-in-law
I remember Nancy as a sweet, happy,
funny, and caring person. She had so many unique qualities and talents! One
thing I remember about Nancy is that she liked to collect hats. She had a
really fun collection. When my sister and I graduated from high school in 1986,
our mom made us each a beautiful white dress. The two patterns we chose were
somewhat “old fashioned” in style. We thought it would be fun to get our
pictures taken in the dresses together, in black and white, so that the photo
would look like an old photograph. For the picture, we wanted hats to go with
the dresses. We asked Nancy if we could look over her hat collection and she
was happy to let us do that, and to let us borrow any hats that we might
choose. I thought that it was very generous of her to share her precious hats
with us!
We did find two hats that we took with
us to get the photograph taken. One hat had blue trim and the other one had
pink ribbon on it, but since the photo is black and white, they blend in
perfectly. I’ve attached the picture if you’d like to see it.
I wish I could have spent more time
with Nancy. She was one of my favorite people to be around!
Contributor: Sherri
Wiltbank
Relationship to Nancy:
Sister-in-law
The main thing I remember and love
about Nancy is that I, like so many others, felt like when I was with her, I
was her best friend. She had a way of making you feel like you were the
most special person in the world and that she absolutely loved you. She
knew how to ask just the right questions and no matter the question, you were
totally comfortable answering it. She offered insights that you had never
considered but were just what you needed. These conversations usually
lasted very LATE into the night!
I remember for the Wiltbank Reunion in
December of 1998, our car broke down and we were not going to be able to go.
Nancy and Keith borrowed his sister Laurel's 15 passenger van so we could
all drive down to Arizona together (even if it meant we had to stop every few
hours to add more oil to the engine :). We were so grateful for their
kindness. Nancy just saw this as a great adventure and opportunity to
start the reunion a little early. We left about 5 a.m. and as a mom with
two young children, I eagerly looked forward to going back to sleep since I
wasn't in the driver's seat. But Nancy wasn't about to let that happen.
She came back to the row I was sitting on, plopped down right next to me
and started chatting and got me chatting until the thoughts of sleep flew out
the window. Initially, I really wanted to sleep but I am so grateful that
she didn't let that opportunity pass us by. She knew life was meant to be
lived to the fullest and she was going to not only do that herself, but encourage
all those around her to do that as well.
I learned so many things from Nancy -
to have a zest for life, READ!, love people, family is important, laugh, music
is awesome, etc. etc. But the lesson I think I will remember the most is
one she taught me about forgiveness. I was having a really hard time
forgiving someone. She listened to me for over an hour and then shared a
very personal experience she had had forgiving someone very close to her.
She taught me about the freeing power of the Atonement and its absolute
ability to bring peace and complete forgiveness. Upon returning home that
evening, I put her advice to the test -- and it worked. I felt a peace in
a way that I had never felt before. This was a very foundational
experience for me and I am so grateful to Nancy for taking that time to teach
me.
I cannot wait to see Nancy again and I
hope there will be time for another late night chat.
Contributor: Kirsten Moody
Relationship to Nancy: Daughter
I have too
many memories to count. I remember one from when I was very young. I sometimes
didn’t wash my hands when I went to the bathroom (gross, I know). Anyway, when
my poor mother asked me why and tried to get me to start washing my hands every
time, she asked me why I didn’t wash my hands. I told her it was because I was
afraid of the sound the toilet made when it flushed. So, once I flushed the
toilet, I would run out of the bathroom. My mom suggested that I wash my hands
first and then I could flush the toilet. Then, I could still flush and run out
the door. I remember thinking it was a silly, childish thing, but my mom took
the time to help me think of a solution. She didn’t patronize me for having a
silly problem. She recognized that for me it was a problem and she helped me.
That was the first of many similar experiences.
She always
made me feel important no matter how big or small my problems were.
Contributor: Shellie
Espinoza
Relationship to Nancy: Cousin
by Marriage
Memory: too
many to write and not enough at all! We’re gonna roll!
One memory I
had with Nancy is I was riding down to Arizona for Thanksgiving with Keith,
Nancy, Alyse
and Kirsten was on her way-Nancy was great with child. We were somewhere in the
middle of nowhere Utah in a snow storm and as we came around a bend in the
freeway we could see up ahead a pileup of cars and people milling about. Keith
was driving, Nancy was in the passenger seat, I was behind Nancy and Alyse was
in her car seat next to me. Keith tried to slow down but the road was really
icy. As we approached, Nancy started a running dialog of what was going to
happen. “We’re going to hit that guy!” Keith veers to the right1 “We’re going
to hit the mile marker” Keith manages to go between two of them, slalom style.
“We’re going to go in the ditch!!!” We do indeed start sliding towards the
ditch! “We’re gonna ROOOOLLLLL!”
But, we
didn’t. we just sort of slid diagonally to the bottom and the momentum shot us
up, out of the ditch, and onto the other side. We slid to a stop. “WHEW!” We
didn’t roll!” Then Keith says-
“How are we
going to get back?” He looks around and says, “Hey! We’re on an onramp!” So we
drove up ahead of the whole pileup to the entrance, where we were directed by
Highway Patrol back to the nearest podunk town as they had closed the highway.
Nancy always was a good narrator. And this was just a few minutes of the many,
many adventures we had together.
Nothing was
ever quite ordinary if Nancy was in the mix, and I felt right at home with
that.
Happy 50th
Nancy!!!!
Contributor: Timo Mostert
Relationship to Nancy:
Cousin
Memory: When
I came out with my brother Mika to go in the MTC, we stayed at the Wiltbank’s
house and
went bowling with Nancy. She was still in high school at the time. Fun times.
Contributor: Daniel Miller
Relationship to Nancy:
Nephew
Memory:
When Keith
and Nancy lived in Boise, our family drove up to visit them. I remember being
really excited to see them. We missed them really bad after they moved. Once we
got there, I’m sure we were our usual selves meaning that the situation was
more than likely quite chaotic with constant fighting, some of which I’m
probably guilty of instigating. I remember a fight breaking out and I felt like
my parents getting after me for starting it, but I hadn’t. This time it
honestly wasn’t me. In this instance though, justice was sacrificed for
something that resulting in peace and quiet faster. I remember Nancy being my only
advocate. She didn’t fight or question my parents’ parenting. She had an errand
to run and she offered to take me along with her so I could have some
one-on-one time. It meant so much to me. I remember her talking to me the whole
drive and at the store just like I was her long-time friend. Unfortunately, I
don’t have many more details to this memory. I left on my mission a week after
the accident. I missed the funeral because I was in the MTC. It was easier for
me, albeit cowardly, to pretend that Keith and Nancy were and still are just in
Texas. I have never really had closure about the accident.
The truth is
that I am resentful that some live while others are robbed of that privilege. I
really wish I could have had an adult relationship with Keith and Nancy. I miss
them both terribly.
Contributor: Richard
Wiltbank
Relationship to Nancy:
Brother and sometimes antagonist
Memory:
One of my
most interesting memories of Nancy is when I was in 6th or 7th grade. I was
talking to a friend on the school bus and he said something about Nancy being
so shy. I said “Nancy who?” I couldn’t for the life of me think who he could be
talking about, since the only Nancy I knew was most definitely NOT shy, quiet
or reserved! I guess she came across a bit differently to the rest of the
world, at least when she was that age.
Another
wonderful memory I have of Nancy is how she was such a great friend, especially
to those who may not have had many friends. On our school bus route, we had one
family that were very poor, lived in a very small, run-down house. These kids
wore dirty clothes and were usually unbathed and unruly. But, there was one
girl, Maxina, who was Nancy’s age. Nancy would sit next to Maxina on the bus
and talk to her during the whole bus ride. One day, after
Maxina and
her siblings had gotten off the bus, I said something that was unkind about
them.
Nancy looked
at me in surprise and disappointment and said, “Why would you say that about my
friend?” She was loyal to her friend at all times.
One more:
for Christmas Eve, our family always had 2 plays that we would put on: the
traditional Christmas story and a secular, Santa Claus story. For as long as I
can remember,
Nancy would
write, direct, make costumes and star in the secular play. We had some
wonderful times practicing those plays as Nancy would rewrite her story over
and over and over. We were often not sure exactly what we were going to end up
with until we were on “stage” Christmas
Eve.
Contributor: Orval and
Vonda Skousen
Relationship to Nancy:
Surrogate Grandparents to Nancy’s children (Marcia Johnson’s parents)
I loved watching Nancy and baby Allyse on their front
porch visiting with Marcia, Catherine and Kevin. They were often there in the afternoon under
the shade of the huge sycamore tree in the front yard.
Then just before moving to Texas, all the Lee Johnson
family came by for family pictures.
Nancy was always interesting and fun to visit with. She was positive, happy and busy with plans
and ideas. She was a very caring and
loving mother.
Contributor: Lane Johnson
Relationship to Nancy:
Brother-in-Law and surrogate father to Nancy’s children
Nancy may be the only person in the world (besides my
wife) that has ever sat down with me and listened to me blab (for probably at
least 10 minutes or more) about how
amazingly cool the Prokofiev Symphony #5 is (one of my all-time favorites).
That was a lot of parentheticals! And not only did she listen to me blab, she
was truly interested in what I was saying and how excited I was about it. Then,
she sat for many minutes more and listened to the symphony with me. She had a
rare talent of really be interested in people and their lives, what mattered to
them. That experience has always meant a lot to me and has helped me on many
occasions to remember to do the same with others (even though I’m not nearly as
good at it J).
Contributor: E. Lee Johnson
Relationship to Nancy:
Father-in-law
In 1997, Dianne and I had the privilege of going on the
re-enactment of the Pioneer trek across the plains. We rode in a wagon
pulled by horses part of the time, and part of the time, and part of the time
some of us walked beside the wagon. We
had a beautiful time seeing the country that the Pioneers passed through and
enjoying each-others company. Nancy was
really great company on that trip, and we had a great opportunity to find out
just how talented and interesting she was.
We came to realize just how fortunate our son, Keith, was to have her
for a wife. The children they left
behind have helped us to remember her by exhibiting many of traits and talents.
Contributor: Lisa Wiltbank
Relationship to Nancy: Niece
We did not live near Nancy over the years, so my favorite
memories of Aunt Nancy from family reunions, when she lit up the stage!!
Contributor: Milo Wiltbank
Relationship to Nancy:
Older brother
She laughed. Wow,
Nancy could laugh. Who knew what she was
laughing about but her laugh was infectious.
When she spoke, her words could never catch up with her
mind. She spoke with enthusiasm,
passion, and excitement because she had a lot of living to do in an inadequate
time.
When Nancy was born, I was nine years old. We lived in New Jersey. She grew up in a
hectic house full of older kids. She seemed to enjoy the hectic atmosphere and
as soon as possible she joined right in.
I remember visiting Nancy and Keith at their apartment in
Texas when he was doing his Master’s degree at Texas A&M. All the kids were there with fun and
excitement in heaps. All of us watched
“Jaws”, apparently one of Keith’s favorite movies. I was attending a scientific meeting called
Society for the Study of Reproduction (SSR), a meeting of about 1,000
scientists that study reproduction. We
went on a double date to the SSR dance that was at the Texas Hall of Fame. We ate, we danced, we drank, virgin drinks-
much to the chagrin of the bartender. We
kept dancing during the night, as the line dancing started. Nancy and Keith were the most photogenic of
the dancers. Their picture, kicking up their heels, ended up on the front page
of the newsletter.
Contributor:
Anna (pew) Harrison
Relationship
to Nancy: 1st Cousin Once Removed
I’ve been thinking for weeks about what to
write but every time I pictured a memory of Nancy it didn’t seem like enough.
Growing up in Idaho provided me with countless times with her and the family. A
few Thanksgivings, many birthdays, hiding in the trunk of the car with the
other kids at the 4th of July celebration because we were scared of the
fireworks. There were no other relatives in Boise besides our two families so
we did a lot together. I guess she’s my second cousin or something but she felt
more like my aunt, or like a second mom. Glimpses race through my mind of her
laughing, always laughing and laughing at or making slightly inappropriate
jokes. My parents had a small singing group with them so they were at our house
like at least once a week for singing practice and all of the kids would hide
up in the game room, singing along with harmonies of the songs. Nobody had the
flare when they sang a solo like Nancy did.
Throughout my childhood she is a constant, a person who was often there.
But I only got to know her and see her with a child’s eyes.
And maybe it’s odd but some of my memories
of her consist of years since the accident. Being not only cousins but also
best friends with Alyse gifted me with the chance to learn more about Nancy as
Alyse would share with me personal insights from Nancy’s journals or from
Alyse’s personal memories and such. I had the chance to get to know Nancy as I
grew into a teenager and then into an adult.
And as the years go I find myself
connecting with her in deep and personal ways. I know that we would have been
good friends because of the things that I know of her, we are a lot alike! But
also because Alyse is so much alike her, and Alyse and I have been so close
through the years, and through her I feel close to Nancy. I have also gotten
closer to Kirstin as adults and I love seeing Nancy in her as well.
I don’t
know if I am even making any sense. I guess what I am trying to say is that the
pain that comes from time being cut short has been punctuated with the sweet
ways that she lives on. Her writings, her art, stories, her laugh that still
echoes through my mind, her kids, and her spirit that truly never left. I am
grateful I’ve been able to get to know her through these years.
Contributor: Bryant Perkins
Relationship: Son of Catherine Perkins
[Memory of Caleb]
I remember Caleb telling me about when
Nancy and Keith were in the car accident and he got that scar. Also, every week I come to piano lessons and
I love to play with Caleb.
Contributor: Catherine Perkins
Relationship to Nancy: Niece (and surrogate
daughter. I figure if my parents can take her children under their wings here,
then Nancy must have me under her wing up there. J)
The thing I remember most about Nancy was
her infectious laugh. I remember distinctly praying the moment I found out
about the accident pleading with Heavenly Father that I would always be able to
remember it because I loved it so much. She laughed so readily and truly it
lifted me up every time.
I also remember having so many conversations
that I was amazed that she was listening to me- just a little kid- but she
acted so sincerely interested. And I talked a lot- a LOT- so I was fairly used
to people seeming a little bit like they were trying to find a breath to escape
the conversation. Nancy was not like that. She listened so well, and really the
better way to phrase it is that she conversed. I could tell she was interested
because she was interested in me and she spoke back.
I love her so much- I can’t wait for my
children and husband to know her and meet her and Keith.
Contributor: Clint Johnson
Relationship to Nancy: Son
Memory of my Mom
My mom was always so much fun. When I was
really little I remember going up to my mom and saying I’m bored. She suggested
that we play soccer. So we played soccer. She went very easy on me and always
let me win. After that I would always go to her and ask her to play soccer
because she was my best friend.
I remember another time I was trying to
learn how to play Star Wars on the piano. I liked to just play it over and
over. My mom kept telling me that I was playing it wrong but I didn’t care I
wanted to just to play. Finally she said “you are not allowed to play that song
anymore until you learn how to play it right.” So I learned and realized how
much cooler it sounded.
Contributor: Marci Johnson
Relationship to Nancy: Niece of Nancy and sibling to
her children
I don’t remember Nancy unfortunately. My
one memory is when their family was driving from Idaho to Texas on their last
move and they stopped by our house for the night. All the kids were playing in
the backyard and all the adults sat in a circle in the front yard as they
looked at the stars and talked. I remember running from the back to the front
to talk to the adults and I think that Nancy was talking and laughing as I
talked to them.
Besides that I am left with memories of her
kids-mostly Andre. I always felt like I had a little insight into Nancy through
Andre though. He looks like Keith, but I feel like his spirit is like Nancy. He
is so much fun, so creative, and a super, duper deep thinker. I remember hours
and hours of playing with Andre, laughing with him, and admiring his
creativity. I think my favorite memory of Andre is when we were watching
Napolean Dynamite, and at one part of the movie he was laughing so hard that he
couldn’t close his mouth and he started drooling everywhere. I picture Nancy
like that as a kid, even though I didn’t get the chance to spend some time with
her.
Contributor: Rebecca Miller
Relationship to Nancy: Sister
I have many memories of Nancy but what I
decided to write about is Nancy’s personality both as I remember and also in
some emails she has written.
First are my memories:
She was always the life of the party, the
center of attention, the person that everyone wanted to be with. She cared about everyone and everything. She had a wonderful way of turning every
conversation away from herself and toward you.
She loved all of us in her family. She especially loved Keith. I am sure she was thrilled to have him join
her in Heaven. She celebrated their
anniversary in January as “lover’s day”.
She was totally in love with that man and she showed it to everyone. She also loved her children. When she visited my house when Douglas was
sick, she called home every day to talk to her children. Andre was only 4 at the time but they would
talk for a long time…what do you talk to a 4 year old about for that long? She did it.
It was going to be Kirsten’s birthday.
We looked and looked for the perfect gift to give her. She finally decided on a marionette that she
knew Kirsten would love. Who can forget
the limo that she allowed Alyse and her friend to go in? She loved her children so much.
When Douglas was sick and in the hospital
for several months, she came to visit and care for us. She brought Douglas 40’s hat because she knew
he was bald and that he loved the 40’s style.
She did hard things. When she
visited we had a mouse that got caught in a trap in our garage. We were leaving so I said I would send the
teenage boy over after our party. We had
forgotten something; she went home to get it and also took care of the
mouse. I asked her why she had done it.
She said, “Because I made a goal to do one hard thing every day.”
She loved her parents and siblings. Here is something she wrote for a book I made
about Mom:
I remember waking up every morning to a kitchen
full of breakfast. Mom always cooked breakfast: eggs or hot cereal, toast,
orange juice, cocoa. She didn't make
everything every day, but even on cold cereal days she put everything out on
the counter. It looked so inviting.
When I got older Mom told me she wasn't a morning
person. That surprised me. I always loved mornings in the kitchen with
Mom. I loved hearing her sing while she
did her morning work. My favorite was
"It's a lovely day today. And whatever
you've got to do it's a lovely day for doing it, it's true." I also like "Why is the sky so blue
today? Why is the robin's song so
gay? Why is the da da da da da? Only because it's spring." And sometimes she whistled. One time Milo was staying at our house. At breakfast I pointed him to the cereal
cupboard. He opened the door and said,
"Wow, this is Mom's cupboard."
I carried the same line of cereal as Mom: Cheerios, Post Toasties (never Kellogg's Corn
Flakes!), Wheaties, Grape Nuts, Chex. I
liked those warm mornings in the kitchen.
Sometimes Mom would set me on the counter to put my shoes and socks
on. Before she put my socks on she
wrapped her hands around each foot and rubbed to warm them up. I never realized until thinking about it now
how lucky I was to have a mom who loved to make extra‑strength cocoa for me in
the morning.
I think Nancy is the best source to tell
about herself. A few excerpts from
letters follow:
Today Dad would have been 75
year old. Instead he’s one of the few
people I know who lived his entire life in only one century. It’s not right to wallow in my grief, that’s
not what life’s about, but every once in a while, on special days like today, I
allow myself a few memories, some tears and a bit of longing to be with him
again.
It’s moving day so I don’t
really have anything else to do but type around my keyboard and stare at Jan
become Marcia. Marcia turned into Jan
and.... Actually I am enjoying my break
sitting here where I can watch Keith’s muscle ripple under the weight of all
those boxes I packed with rocks... What
a hottie.. He’s so hot his shirt is
soaking.
This is what she wrote after she told about
when Caleb stopped breathing and only Alyse was there to help when they were
moving into their home in McKinney.
I couldn't let my kids go to school the next day.
Alyse insisted on going, she had exams, but the others were more than happy to
stay home and help us unload the truck.
I kept thinking about that scripture in the Book of Mormon when Jesus
talks about how often he wanted to gather his children like a mother hen
gathers her chicks. That's always
been a poignant symbol of parenting to me. Anyway, that's how I felt, I wanted
to gather my darlings around me and protect them from
everything. But then there's always
dishes to wash and messes to clean up and
the mean mother in me sneaks to the surface again. I don't know how to shake loose of her,
especially when I'm surrounded by chaos and two tons of work that I, and only
I, can do.
She continues on to write about Clint and
getting his depression medicine right
I forgot to mention a tiny bit of bright news; Yesterday Clint said to me, “Mom, I
think this medicine might be working.”
“Really,” I said “You're not
just saying that to make me feel better are you?”
Clint said, “No, I just had this feeling. I mean, for a second I felt
really good. It was
so nice and then it disappeared and I thought, 'Wait, come back, I want
to feel like that some more.'”
Why does that make me think about heaven and about those tiny moments
when we look at each other and recognize something incredible before it fades
away from our perception?
You're each
precious to me. Sorry for all the sentiment but my Yellow (fun-motivated)
personality is sleeping in, you know how she hates Mondays, so the writing's
all coming from me, my emotional Blue self.
If Yellow
were here she'd probably make some comment about how I'm a good timin' girl too
being the emotional stripper that I am.
So, I didn't expose more than you
wanted to see.
~Nancy
HAPPY
50TH BIRTHDAY NANCY
